TLDR: The best advice you can get is often the advice you would give.
Last week, while driving to the beach, I received a call from one of our founders.
There’s something about a hands-free call on a road trip that just hits differently, especially when you enjoy what you do.
And while fun, I also left the call feeling like it’s easier to give advice than to follow it.
Might have something to do with our myopic illusions of self, but I digress.
The founder was responding to a potential investor and wanted feedback on what to say.
The question was one he had received before, but the answer had been controversial.
You can imagine the emotional baggage that came with the redux, and why he wanted to answer with context and a full explanation.
My feedback was that he was responding emotionally rather than logically.
Instead, I suggested cavespeak.
Facts, nothing more.
He had already weighed and made an important decision as the CEO, so why subject the investor to the entire line of thinking, and open up the possibility of discourse?
We debated the merits of brevity and candor for the situation, and I asked him to humor me, “what is the truth, and how few words can you use?”
His answer: one and “contractors”
And if you’ve ever sent an intensely brief email, you know the nerves of wanting to be understood as a prelude to hitting send, so I gave him the classic reframe:
“What advice would you give someone else in this situation?”
It’s the obvious coaching move when you want someone to arrive at the answer themselves versus telling them what to do.
So he sent it, and got a response within seconds:
“Got it,” the investor confirmed.
After getting the outcome he hoped for, we wondered where emotional writing might be showing up in our work, and what impact it was having:
How many hours have we wasted writing unnecessarily long emails?
How often was length to our benefit versus detriment?
Why are we brief with some, and long-winded with others?
You get the idea.
The best advice you can get is often the advice you would give.
See you Monday.
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